Parents who are able to work together after divorcing can help their children to thrive by using the co-parenting model. This enables the children to enjoy consistency between homes because many of the rules remain consistent from one to the other. We know this is a challenge, but having some serious negotiations with your ex might be beneficial.
Discuss the rules that you have with your ex and listen to the rules at that house. Decide which ones you can tweak a bit to make them work at both homes. Some, such as the time the kids go to bed, might need to be consistent for younger kids. Other rules, such as no running in the house, might not need to happen at both homes if one parent allows that type of behavior. You should feel free to use your judgement.
When you are setting up the initial parenting plan, you need to think realistically about what you can do. The schedule should be contingent upon your and your ex’s schedules so that you have a reliable plan for the children. If the children are very active in extracurricular activities, church or sports, you should consider that as well.
We realize that things might be a bit challenging, especially at first. However, co-parenting gives your children an advantage because both adults are actively working to figure out what is best for them.
This way of parenting between two homes isn’t perfect. There are going to be times when you and your ex don’t see things in the same manner. If compromise just isn’t possible, you may need to return to court to have the judge give you the answer. We can help you to represent your side of the matter in these cases.